In a city like LA, it’s easy to become so caught up in to-do lists and mindless distractions (hello, Instagram) that life flies past in a blur. We dove into the new book by Mallika Chopra—yes, the daughter of Deepak—to learn how to kick that overwhelmed feeling and live more purposefully.
As the daughter of Oprah-approved meditation guru and author Deepak Chopra, you’d think Mallika Chopra would have her life totally together, but she insists that’s not the case. “[A few years ago] I said to my dad, ‘I’m kind of a disaster,’” she recalled in front of a packed room of friends and admirers—fashion designer Rachel Roy and journalist Lisa Ling among them—at Brentwood’s Unplug Meditation last weekend. “’I was exhausted, I was stressed, I was addicted to sugar.” The pair then started examining every corner of the younger Chopra’s life, from career to leisure time and beyond, to determine how she could live with a clearer sense of purpose and happiness.
1. To Find Your Purpose, Ask Yourself These Three Questions
“Even though I’ve [always] lived in this world of self-help, I’m not the most regular meditator,” Chopra admits. “Until I became a mother I never really asked myself ‘Who am I?’ ‘What do I want?’ and ‘How can I serve?’” But by sitting in silence for a few minutes a day and asking herself those three questions, “I was able to remember who I was, what would make me happy, and what my deepest desires are,” she says.
2. Pump the Brakes
“When we slow down to notice [what’s around us], the universe gives us the signs we need,” says Chopra. “The amazing people, places, and circumstances you find yourself in every day can sometimes lead to real magic.”
3. Just Say No
We live in an age when being busy is a badge of honor, leaving many of us to fill our schedules to capacity without thinking about whether our commitments are really worth our time. Chopra’s advice: “Bring more mindfulness to what you say yes to, and say no more often.” This will leave more room for meaningful activities and relationships.
“When you express what you want out loud, people want to support you,” says Chopra. “And when people support one another, it instills confidence and inspires action.” Exhibit A: After telling her friends that she wanted to start an exercise routine, Chopra had workout buddies lining up to keep her accountable. Her digital platform, Intent.com, allows users to share their dreams and inspire others.
5. Be Nice to Yourself
Sometimes, the biggest thing sabotaging your goals is… you. Says Chopra: “There’s so much going on inside of us—all the self-criticism and doubt—that sometimes we need to just let go and be like, ‘It’s OK not to be perfect. It’s OK to waver off the path. It’s OK to have a chocolate chip cookie.’ We have to forgive ourselves.”
6. Connect the Dots
So many intentions, but so little time? Try joining up disconnected areas of your life and see what happens. For instance, if you want to see the world and get fit, go on a yoga retreat; if you want to nurture your creative side and your friendships, invite a pal to start a blog with you.
7. You Don’t Need Your Name in Lights to Make an Impact
“I’d grown up hearing that we all have a unique purpose, but honestly, it stressed me out so much because I didn’t know what my purpose was,” says Chopra. “Sometimes I feel like I’m [just] a soccer mom… is that enough?” She got her answer while chatting with spiritual leader Eckhart Tolle, who said: “I call people who are doing the extraordinary in their ordinary lives the ‘frequency holders.’ When they do this from a place of love, connection, and authenticity, these people are changing the frequency of the world. There’s nothing more important for you to be than a soccer mom, and to do it with your whole energy and passion.”
PHOTOGRAPHY BY NOEL VASQUEZ/GETTY IMAGES
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